Thursday, May 2, 2013

Day 2: Something I Know A Lot About

First I thought about writing about at being a bridesmaid, I know a lot about that.  If I had kept all the dresses I would have a closet 27 Dresses worthy of sharing.  However, I decided my hot pink bridesmaid dresses (yes, I had more than one) would have a higher probability of being worn again if I donated to a charity that provides prom dresses to girls.  I retired from bridesmaid duties this January and have sworn off walking down the aisle until I am the one wearing white.

I know a lot about serving tables, I have served/bar tended for the past six years ...

A lot of people are hangry when they go out to eat.  While I am taking their order I am convinced they might pull a steak knife on me to get their food, once it is in their belly I am the greatest person in the world.

If a guest is over 70 the soup will never be warm enough.  They want it scalding hot.  And probably want coffee when it is 100 degrees outside.

They also probably don't want to be sat by children either, because you know "non-children" sections exist. Right.

People think it is their right to drink, it actually is a privilege.  I can cut you off.

Never assume people actually read the menu.

Thus they try and order the Bloomin' Onion.  I don't work at a place even remotely close to an Outback.

Then they will swear up and down that they had a Bloomin' Onion here once.  Then they will again ask me if I am sure we don't have a Bloomin' Onion.

People think if they wink at you and order their drink easy ice they will get more alcohol.  All you will get is more of whatever the alcohol is being mixed with.  If you want a stronger drink order a double.

You always get a table on Friday night who has to be somewhere in a hurry.

They usually also order their meat well done. Help me help you, order it RARE.  Or go to McDonald's.

People love  to say they are ready to order and then point to everyone else at the table to buy them more time to look at the menu.  Don't waste my time.

Parents also love to say they are ready to order and then go through each and every item with their child on the kids menu while I am standing there.  Nothing is worse than trying to take an order while a kid is having a meltdown because we don't have a corn dog.

People like to make disgusted faces when you off them meat cooked medium.  I don't even think people realize they do it.

Pepsi lovers also make said disgusted face when I ask them if Coke is alright.  I am a Coke loyalist so I don't understand why they are upset ;)

People love to apologize for coming into eat 5 minutes before we close.  I understand we are still open - but if you feel like you need to apologize for coming in - go somewhere else.  Or leave me a FAT TIP.

All sarcasm aside I do enjoy my job, most days, there are just some angry hangry people that make it a little more difficult to be polite.  I also firmly believe you can tell a lot about a person based on how they treat servers.

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  1. I think I would be horrible at that job!

  2. I also have plenty of bridesmaid experience... and like you, I'm ready to retire until I'm the one wearing white ;) Fun read!

  3. I always wanted to do server or waitress when I was in college because I'd heard that it would be good money but I was always too chicken! It looks so complicated. I knew I'd drop the tray and mess up every order and then the people would be so mean to me. I dealt with customers in retail and that was tough enough.

  4. This is awesome, because it is 100% true. Although the people that need to read this, never will.


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